Letter from Lhasa, number 258. (Sayre 2001): Unstoppable Confidence. Unleash your Natural Confidence Within
by Roberto Abraham Scaruffi
Sayre, K., Unstoppable Confidence. Unleash your Natural Confidence Within, Unstoppable Books, Portland, Oregon, USA, 2001.
(Sayre 2001).
Kent Sayre
“By changing your language you change your life” is one of the basic NLP techniques of this book.
Confidence is the ability to achieve goals. Consequently, a founding aspect is to interiorise this ability. One can do it by deactivating negative internal voices while activating the positive ones.
That is less easy that it may seem. In fact, many ‘confident’ people simply show optimism, what is different from a deep and real confidence. To show is not necessarily, or rarely is, to be, as well as positive language (positive relatively to goals) is different from sugary languages.
As first step, or one of the first steps, the author suggests suppressing doubts from language, using only absolutistic expression, about what one intend to do.
Basically, it is the problem of confidence, which is different from showing confidence as well from convincing people showing a confidence they have not.
“There’s also a confidence at the level of belief. This level means that, you believe you’re confident. You think so, you think you’re confident. You’re pretty sure. You say, ‘I am confident’. But the ideal is to get to a point where, you are so absolutely confident that it’s a given. You don’t need to think about it anymore. You are confident. You just are confident. It’s your way of being. So, if you think about your beliefs, some of them, you’re not even aware of since they’re just a given. It’s just natural. If you’ve integrated your occupation into your identity, like you’re a salesperson or you’re a doctor, or you’re a nurse, or you’re an attorney or whatever. That’s just a given. It’s not a belief that you have. It’s just your way of being. You know no differently.”
(Sayre 2001, p. 38)
Learn from mistakes. To see the positive aspect of everything and everybody. Even if one cannot always control the outside world, one can always control oneself. Avoiding mind-reading, or to suppose mind-reading, other people will improve your communication with other people. Assumptions about other people are frequently wrong. Conjectures are usually deceptive.
Of course, near the end this Americanish book, there are “twenty explosive techniques for unstoppable confidence”. Decidedly too many, even if the field is complex. Basically, what people need is a combination of visualization and action for building positive and confident habits.
Sayre, K., Unstoppable Confidence. Unleash your Natural Confidence Within, Unstoppable Books, Portland, Oregon, USA, 2001.
